The Sex Pitfall, Balancing Hormones and the Head

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column captured my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to get love, and males use love to get sex." This is a excellent summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where singles analyze great sex as love. However those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further due to the fact that for these singles, making love carries enormous significance and consequences.

Singles fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 ways:

A.they believe sex is a required test of compatibility, (if the sex is excellent then the relationship will be great as well).

B.more frequently, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical destination-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to keep in touch with truth when all those hormones are running wild. Our body reacts to someone we are drawn in to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), that makes the chance to make love with someone we are brought in to very tough to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce emotions), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical responses are strong and uncontrolled , resulting in powerful sensations of tourist attraction, enjoyment, love, well-being, and nearness .

When issues check that emerge, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, but the sex is excellent!" They probably wouldn't confess it, however they focus on physical intimacy and regard the rest as optional. Their primary scouting tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with gay men, states that much of his customers have actually fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men particularly in cosmopolitan locations, sex is readily offered, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if Read Full Report the sex isn't really going to be great?".

North includes, "I believe this is a ' man' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to point out that chemistry is essential. Chemistry is a provided that we cannot manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the collaboration to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry take place, though sometimes it can grow in time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and truth hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you must stabilize your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This indicates integrating chemistry with typical sense. While good sex is necessary for a sustainable relationship, you require to make your partner options by paying full attention to your vision, values, objectives, and requirements -- while feeling all those exciting sparks!

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